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The American Fertility Association Blog
Insider…Outsider
December 5, 2007 - Wednesday
Posted by Pamela
I think that there are times in life when a person can feel put outside of the circle of their own existence. And not trust what they always thought to be true. It can be a soul shattering experience.
It is an awful feeling to think that the ground is firm beneath your feet...and that you can trust it...and then find the earth shake...and the firmness that you have always taken for granted simply isn’t so.
You can find yourself in a situation with you own health...friendships...even jobs where you always thought you were an insider ...you now find yourself to be an outsider.
Most recently, it was standing by my sister bed in an emergency room trying to get her help...here I am...and a renowned patient advocate..and I was suddenly an outsider...I could not work the system...and I could not get relief for my sister.
I remember after I had my first son Tyler...finally becoming an “insider” in the “Mommy Club”....I could finally walk into a playground...and I joined a play group in my neighborhood. I felt like I belonged. I knew the secret passwords to this club...and then one day..when Tyler was about two years old...one by one each of my friends announced within two weeks that they were pregnant. In a split second...I went from being an insider to an outsider...once again. I remember the pain in my belly. Will ever end?
My friendships with these women never quite recovered...even after I conceived my second son, Spencer. Because once you are made to feel like an outsider...it is so hard to feel like an insider ever again.
I want you to know that you belong here...no matter where you are in your life journey...whether you are just thinking about conceiving and nervous...or coping with choosing between pursuing adoption or third party reproduction through our no barriers free membership...through our support groups...through the messages board..I want you to know that you will always have a home with The AFA.
Having been on the outside more than I would ever have liked...I want to make sure that you know...that with me...and the rest of The AFA Team...you have a friend.
Categories
Adoption •
Third Party Reproduction
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