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The American Fertility Association Blog

Secrets

May 20, 2009 - Wednesday
Posted by Corey

I was interviewed by Vogue Magazine today about the Manicures & Martinis Infertility Prevention Program.  The editor wanted to know what the most important take home message from the series was.  I circled around that for awhile and this is what I truly think.  More than anything else on the planet, people are entitled to their own personal truth.  The truth about themselves.  And women deserve to know the truth about their own biological clocks and what their bodies can and can’t do.

Personal truth.  In my view, people have the right to know.  Were they were donor inseminated?  Or adopted?  Carried by a surrogate?  Whatever it is, we all have the right to know. 

You know what?  Facebook has been very good to me.  I have reconnected with friends and family I haven’t seen in years and years but never stopped loving.  I have brought lots of family back into my life, among them, seven cousins, especially my cousin Robyn who is one of the true loves of my life.  But another cousin too, who was adopted in 1955, the same year I was born.  But you know what’s really weird – I don’t think he knows he’s adopted.  And here we sit, reconnecting over coffee after all these years, and I have a secret.  His secret.  We are both in our fifties, and even after all this time, it’s so bizarre.  I don’t think he knows that we are not biologically linked.  And to tell you the truth, it is making me crazy. 

God, how the world has changed since the 1950’s, it’s like another planet, not another era.  I have a funny photograph of my cousin being bottle fed by his mom while she is holding a cigarette in the same hand.  Child abuse by today’s standards.

My cousin has a right to know.  And I don’t know what the hell to do.

Corey Whelan
Program Director
The American Fertility Association

Categories
AdoptionDonor SpermFertility PreservationInfertilityIUISurrogacy

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