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By Joanne DeMarco

That’s what many hopeful adoptive parents ask themselves after becoming certified to adopt. What should you do next? First, take a deep breath and don’t feel overwhelmed. There are a few techniques you can use to maximize your chances of making contact with expectant parents considering adoption for their unborn baby. It’s critical to your success that you network and advertise effectively. Due to the instability and longer wait times of many international programs, as well as the influx of families signing up with domestic agencies, independent adoption has become very competitive. In order to have the best chance at a successful placement, you must do everything that you can to get the word out there of your plans to adopt. A little luck, good timing and fate, never hurt either!

For many hopeful adoptive parents-there are three good ways to spread the word of your plans to adopt. Each of these three methods is equally effective and works. One approach is networking-spreading the word by word of mouth, email or mailing a networking letter to friends and family. Next is newspaper ads-they can be expensive, but they still work as those considering adoption look in newspapers and penny savers to find adoptive parents (just like in Juno). Lastly, in the age of the internet, an adoption website is a terrific and inexpensive way to literally reach millions of people.

Networking is a very effective way to make everyone you know aware of your plans to adopt a baby.  Just telling people when you talk to them is one way to spread the word. Tell your friends and family to tell people they know to keep their ears open, in case they hear of a situation. Some folks prefer to do a mailing to family and friends telling them of your plans to adopt. You can write a nice letter explaining a little about independent adoption and how they can help you in your search. It’s also a good idea to enclose a few adoption networking card with your letter. These are business cards with your contact information on them such as your toll free number, website and email address. I recommend sending this mailing to all friends and family in your address book. Another way to communicate your plans quickly and inexpensively is by sending your family and friends an email announcing your plans to adopt a baby. Include contact information and ask them to forward this email to their contacts so the word gets out there! Online social networking sites like Myspace and Facebook are the newest way for tech savvy people to keep in touch with friends and get the word out about your adoption plans!

Networking with other folks pursuing independent adoption is very important. You already have a lot in common, as you have the same goal. It’s great to have others to talk to that understand the trials and tribulations of seeking an expectant parent considering adoption for their unborn child. There are days when you just may need to vent. Friendships and bonds may form. One very positive thing that can come out of this type of networking is the potential to help each other out. Take note of what type of child these other couples are hoping to adopt, and take down their toll free numbers. In the event that you get a call and the unborn baby is not the type of child you were hoping to adopt, you can refer the expectant parent on the phone to another couple. If a couple wants to adopt one baby and successfully adopts, only to get a phone call from an expectant parent weeks later, they may refer you! Many an adoption has come from networking with other families hoping to adopt. In my opinion, this is the most important of all the networking techniques!

Because each state has its own restrictions regarding adoption advertising, you must check with your adoption attorney regarding what is permissible by law, in your state. The majority of states allow hopeful adoptive parents to advertise in newspapers for the purpose of adoption. First, it’s a good idea to obtain a toll free number and have it forwarded to your home or cell phone. You should also set a monthly budget for newspaper ads and stick to it. It’s easy to lose track of the money you are spending on print ads, especially if you are placing lots of ads in many newspapers at the same time.  Newspaper ads can be costly and there is no guarantee they will result in any phone calls. It’s important to place ads effectively, so as not to waste money. You want to check the demographics of the area and see if any other adoption ads are running currently and pick newspapers where the ad cost is reasonable. Keep your ad wording to the point. Excessively long ads are not more likely to generate calls. Years ago, print ads were the main way matches were made between expectant parents and adoptive parents and it still works today. About one third of independent adoptions are a result of newspaper or print ads. Initially, I thought newspaper ads were an old fashioned way to spread the word and didn’t have faith they really still worked, but I was wrong. After three months of newspaper ads, ads placed in 92 different papers, our daughter’s birthmother spotted our ad in her local paper and contacted us.

Over the past ten years, the internet has become another avenue of which to advertise your plans to adopt. Most couples will create an adoption website, with information about them, photos and how to contact them. It’s very similar to their adoption profile, but it’s online. They may then choose to link their website to adoption sites that feature hopeful adoptive parents. Advertising online is less expensive, and you can reach a larger audience on a smaller budget. Of course, the internet is worldwide, so you cannot target your audience to particular state or geographic region. It may be a bit time consuming to build your website, but many web hosting companies like yahoo.com, homestead.com and bravenet.com have tools and templates to make website creation a lot easier. If you don’t have an internet presence, you are really at a disadvantage. What it costs to set up a website is well worth the exposure you can gain from it. If you feel comfortable putting your message on the internet, it’s a wonderful way for an expectant parent to learn all about you!
I encourage every hopeful adoptive parent to stick to a monthly budget for advertising and not to be tempted to go overboard on newspaper ads. I also advise investing time researching adoption online as well as placing ads in low cost and free classified sites on the internet. The more effort you put into the process, the sooner you may become parents. Don’t be discouraged when newspaper ads are out there and the phone has not rang in weeks-it happens. If your adoption website isn’t getting hits, you need to starting linking it more, posting to the internet, or tweaking the site to make it more appealing to your audience. If a few months have passed since you sent out a networking email or mailing, do it again. Don’t be discouraged if expectant parent contacts are few and far between-all you need is one call, the right call, expectant parents who choose you, and are committed to the adoption plan.

There is only one way that you can fail at adoption-if you give up. Don’t give up on the process and eventually it will work. You will become parents. It may not be as quickly as you’d like, but eventually it will happen. Independent adoption is a rollercoaster-hold on, take a deep breath and prepare for your journey to parenthood.