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The American Fertility Association Blog
Facing Change
March 16, 2009 - Monday
Posted by Ken
Last year I wrote an article addressing how issues surrounding the topic of infertility would only become more intense in the coming year. What I didn’t realize is the degree to which the infertility conversation would enter mainstream media, and how quickly.
Thus far in 2009, the topic of infertility is everywhere. Whether it’s the mother of eight babies in California or a 60 (plus) year-old woman becoming pregnant through in-vitro fertilization (IVF), infertility has become part of most people’s daily listening and reading, if not daily conversation.
As I write this in mid-March, I’m wondering what’s going to happen this week when the Georgia State Senate considers a “personhood” bill, which defines life at the moment of conception and ascribes all human rights to the embryo from that point forward. The bill would make anyone who damages or destroys an embryo criminally liable, subject to both fines and imprisonment. It would further forbid any disposition of unused embryos except the option to donate them to another couple, (and they do mean married, heterosexual couples). The option to freeze embryos for use at a later date, donate them to scientific research, or dispose of them would be illegal if this bill becomes law.
There are several other bills floating around state legislatures right now. Many are designed to dictate to physicians and patients having difficulty conceiving how many embryos they can create, how many they may transfer, and what the disposition of any unused embryos must be.
New questions are being raised about the use of sperm taken posthumously from a male for the purpose of continuing a family line or ensuring inheritance. Who has the final say in these matters?
Egg freezing is emerging as the most asked about fertility topic of the year. Women and men want to know if eggs can be frozen for use at a later date, similar to what is currently being practiced with unused embryos. If so, what’s the success rate? Is this something we should be encouraging? Are there risks? What are they?
Egg freezing, taking sperm from dead men, legislators dictating what physicians and patients can and can’t do, and the very real possibility of microscopic tissue being called a “child” are just some of the issues The American Fertility Association (The AFA) is helping consumers sort through as they begin or find themselves in the midst of their family building journeys.
7.3 million American women experience difficulty conceiving or bringing a pregnancy to term. Fertility challenges among men may be just as high, as male factor infertility is the sole or contributing cause in about 40% of infertile couples. We are, indeed, faced with a significant challenge.
In addition to providing education and support for those facing fertility challenges, this year, The AFA began an infertility prevention program in which we take education to young women at places they already frequent - like nail salons and health clubs.
Why? There are types of infertility that can be prevented. Avoiding environmental toxins, taking into account the biological clock (fertility begins to decline at age 27 for women and 35 for men) and preventing STD’s are all things that can keep options open for individuals and couples if and when they decide to have children. As everyone knows, prevention, when possible, is the best cure.
Our mission is simple: prevent infertility whenever possible and support people in building families of choice. To learn more, visit us at http://www.theafa.org.
The American Fertility Association, a 501 (c) (3) national non-profit organization is a lifetime resource for infertility prevention, reproductive health and family building. AFA services and materials are provided free of charge to consumers and available to everyone without reservation. These services include an extensive online library, monthly online chats, telephone and in-person coaching, a resource directory, hosted message boards, daily fertility news and a toll-free support line.
http://www.theafa.org or 888.917.3777.
Ken Mosesian
Executive Director
Categories
Donor Egg •
Donor Sperm •
Egg Donation •
Egg Freezing •
Embryo Donation •
Family Building •
Fertility •
Fertility Preservation •
Frozen Embryos •
Frozen Sperm •
Infertility •
IVF •
Reproductive Freedom •
Sexual Health •
Sperm Donation •
Third Party Reproduction
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Dream Catcher Child
October 23, 2007 - Tuesday
Posted by Pamela
I never envisioned myself the mother of boys. When I used to imagine my child, I would picture a little dark haired girl. Sometimes, I would see her in glimpses, holding someone else’s hand. She would have a page-boy hair cut and look a little Asian. I had a long time to imagine and long for this imaginary child.
During the height of my infertility, I used to picture this little child, and tell her why I wanted her so much. I told her what a good mother and father she would have, if she would just be born. I shared my dreams with her. I looked in shop windows at little pink things that I might buy for her. She was my child of hope.
I came across a passage in a novel I was reading recently. It struck an unexpected chord in me, and I was reminded of my “infertility child”. Scottish sisters-in-law who lived in the 1700’s are talking late at night. One is a new mother, with her child at her breast. The new mother was explaining to her sister about how she talked to her baby before the child was born.
“You can talk to a babe, you know. You can tell them anything. You can pour out your soul to them without choosing your words or keeping anything back at all. And that’s a comfort to the soul. I have often wondered if that’s why women are so often sad, once the child is born,” she said meditatively, as though thinking aloud. “Ye think of them while ye talk, and you have a knowledge of them as they are inside ye, the way you think they are. And then they’re born and they’re different - not the way you thought of them inside, at all. And ye love them of course, and get to know them the way they are… but still there is the thought of the child ye once talked to in your heart, and that child is gone. So I think it’s the grievin’ for the child unborn that you feel, even as ye hold the born one in your arms.” And she paused and kissed the downy head of her daughter. “Yes, before....it’s all possibility. It might be a son, or a daughter. A plain child, a bonny one. And then it’s born, and all the things it might have been are gone, because now it is. And a daughter is born, and the son that she might have been is dead,” she said quietly. “And the bonny lad at your breast has killed the wee lassie ye thought you carried. And ye weep for what you didn’t know, and that’s gone for good, until you know the child you have, and then at last it’s as though they could never have been other than they are, and you feel naught but joy in them. But until then, you weep easy.”
The child unknown is an issue for many of those struggling with infertility. The child of infertility for you, may be the child you lost through miscarriage or stillbirth. The child you talked to in your heart may be the one you have to say goodbye to before you are able to pursue adoption or third party reproduction. And like me, you might be surprised to find that you did not or might not, give birth to the baby you were talking to for so long.
I sit on my couch, and watch an old family video of my little family when they were younger. I see two beautiful blond haired boys. Not Asian in appearance, but rather Nordic. Tyler the five year old is actually hugging his little brother and shouts “Family Hug Time”. I watch myself in the video, gathering my treasures in my arms.
Treasures that were buried deep and almost lost. I sniff their hair and kiss their eyelids. I can see the look of wonderment on my own much younger face...it is as though I am thanking the heavens for these boys that are are so real and finally here.
I am caught by the thought of that little girl, so different, that child of my infertility dreams. I think of her, as I watch myself in the midst of solid, sturdy arms wrapped tightly around my neck. And I bless her for keeping me company and giving me hope. Her image challenged me to find some inner strength. In my mind’s eye, she asked me to find her. And I did. In two little boys.
Until Tomorrow,
Pamela
Categories
Adoption •
Donor Sperm •
Egg Donation •
Fertility •
Gestational Carrier •
Infertility •
Pregnancy Loss •
Surrogacy
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